On the muddy, slippery plateau of the waking world, mortality reigns over me with my perception in a limbo and my will cast into a mere whisper of a desire. Pinned to the ground by my expectations, no matter how well I meditate, no matter how efficiently I am driven towards my goal, I can barely muster enough strength to stay upright.
My mutinous sub-conscious fiddles me in the murky waters of confusion. Unraveling yet intoxicating, it severely dampens my ability to discern reality from fantasy. I can certainly shoot the melon; but, it might as well be my own head.
After a sustained entanglement with the dreamy hues, I become hyper-conscious in a boundless, substance-less, timeless existence beyond the physical world. Bereft of any sensory input, disassociated from all emotions, this state strips me off of all reasons, memories, knowledge, impulses and desires. Then, after getting rid of all adulterations, my divine self reasserts itself. I get the means to satiate every possible desire; but with no will or need, the exercise becomes futile.
Now, I can either wait for the circle to complete itself or I can venture ahead.
What lies ahead doesn't come easy. Accessing it can neither be taught nor be learned. Some, like me, are born with the ability; to some, it happens randomly, spontaneously; the remainder wonder eternally whether it actually exists. Never a straight road, this gateway to infinite possibilities is a domain where every law of nature is bent. Re-integrating my will into the equation, it is called the Turiya.
In this sublime nothingness, the extremity of the top is indistinguishable from the beginning of the middle. Wisdom emerging from the confluence of the streams of time drives the mechanism of a blessing or a curse. One splinters into many and many bond coherently as one. The inexhaustible wave, running through the living and the inanimate beyond the layers of separation, has synchronized with my resurrected will. Gushing furiously, it has brought me to the one I sought - Goddess Kali.
